This year I did NOT hastily make New Year’s Resolutions in the waning moments before Rosh Hashana. Why bother? I always make the same exact list. Every year I resolve to yell less, and to run and write more. In a few weeks I hope to run a marathon, and I’m doing so much more writing that I barely have time to blog. The yelling is wishful thinking. For that, I’d need a personality transplant. 
I also resolve to bake less. This year I’m doing a pretty good job. This week, however, my baby turned five. She turned five and asked for a cake with flowers. A cake with flowers that I made myself — how did she even know enough to ask that?
I happened to be in Whole Foods where I picked up some vegan, gluten free, grass fed cake mix (because, why not?) as well as some plant based food coloring. I do not NEED to buy grass fed cake mix and plant based food coloring, but I did NOT want to make a trip to a separate store, especially when that store is likely to be the single dingiest place on earth – my local A and P. 
Turns out, though, that when you use plant based food coloring and try to make an rainbow cake, each layer of the cake will be a different shade of orange. Believe it or not, this is meant to be blue, pink, orange and yellow:
And the shades of rainbow, all of which turn out to be turmeric, do this to your nails: 
 I showed this to the kids and explained that this stain happened because I was wearing clear nail polish. 
“Clear nail polish,” asked a certain 11 year old boy. “What’s the point of that?”
The birthday dessert was looking pretty sorry and I was yellowing quickly. I had no idea how to really frost the cake. My eldest, while watching me dissolve into a full on pre-birthday panic attack reminded me that our neighbor, a high schooler, is also a rather adept cake maker. 
And so he was. He came to our rescue and the gelatinous pile of turmeric mush turned into this:  
 Victory was mine. Mine, with a little help. Fortunately, Fiona hates cake. Her birthday, which is less than two weeks away, will be celebrated with ice cream and gummy bears. 

Posted in Uncategorized on Oct 15, 2015