If I read another Facebook post about someone else’s completion of all her Passover tasks, hours, if not days ahead of schedule… I’ll scream.
Please don’t tell me you’ve just set your Seder table for tomorrow night, because my living room looks like this:

And if I read another post about a spotless kitchen, I’ll choke myself on matzo. Because my cleaning efforts ended in this:

You see, it isn’t just that I lack organization and drive.
I also fear the Passover Horcrux.
For each day that I spend doing nothing but Passover prep (or any sort of home related chore, really), I am sure that a small piece of my soul dies.
Voldemort has nothing on me.
Which is why I procrastinate. Which is why I dodge chores.
Which is why I am woefully behind.